10

I dreamed about you before I even knew you were coming.

Who was this little girl, I wondered in my dream, who was going to come along at just the wrong time, but was shown in the dream to bring light wherever she went?

On a cold January morning ten years ago, you brought your own little light with you into this world.  You were always the light in any situation.  Your babbles and toothless grins made even the worst day more bearable, gave your new big brother something to smile about, and made me realize that the most important thing I could do, for both you and your brother, was to provide you both with a peaceful, loving, stable environment to grow up in.  You gave me focus, and something to aim for: being in one place long enough for you to have the same friends over the course of enough years for it to matter.

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As you grew, and we settled into our little 'burb in the South Bay, I began to realize that you were going to have a couple of advantages over your brother.  He got the young, inexperienced parent; you got the parent who had been around for a few years, and was now confident about what she could and could not do.  Your brother got the contract employee who rarely had time to deal with his issues, as no work equaled no pay; you got the parent with a stable job and benefits that could always be involved with your school activities.  He got the parent that didn't even have a driver's license; you were the primary reason I got licensed and bought my first car, so that I would not have to ride the bus with two children.  Although when it did eventually come back to that, you looked at it as an adventure, and never complained.

You add so much to the lives of your brother and I.  You were the answer to your brother's prayers.  After repeated requests for a younger sibling, he finally got the combination of foil, playmate, buddy and mentee that he always wanted.  I refused to admit it at the time, but I really did want a little girl, and along you came, with all the expected pink, frilly girly-girl things that I expected, a sharp mind capable of picking up on school work so fast that you amaze your teachers, which I absolutely adore, and a surprisingly quick wit for such a little kid.

We are now ten years into this journey, and I continue to discover new things about you.  Even though you seem pretty resilient, I do need to watch out for your tender feelings, which can be easily hurt by my sometimes callous, off hand remarks.  You show an outstanding work ethic, and are one of the few children I ever met who LIKES homework, and realized early on that all work needs to be taken care of before playtime.  You will devour a book in one day if you like it, but can also happily veg out in front of your favorite Disney musicals or cheerleader movies. You love Math, some Science, Computers, shoes, nail polish and shopping.  You are a little bundle of opposites that you make look complimentary, no easy task for us big people, never mind a ten year old girl.  As you get older, and your world gets larger, I hope you can look back on this time of beginnings as a time of wonder, joy, love, discovery, freedom and support from those that love you.

I remember you overhearing a phone conversation I had with someone, and when I called you The Baby, you reminded me that you were NOT a baby.  I then told you that while you were not A baby, you were MY baby.  You gave me a wise grin, said "Ok.  I like that better.", and have reminded me ever since that you were not a baby, you were definitely growing up.  That was never more true than it is today, your 10th birthday.

Exit, baby.  Enter, young lady.